07 July 2008

The Cracks

I have never been this sunburned in my life. I couldn't even sleep last night. I am so miserable. How could I have been so stupid as to go to the beach and not put on any sunblock. I think that the antibiotics I am taking made it even worse. If I thought they could do anything for me I would go to the hospital.

Enough whining. I had a good day at school, even though Mondays are my long day. I don't have a single break other than lunch. I was nodding a bit in my afternoon classes.

Got some nice emails today that cheered me up. My friend Jim sent me a picture of a buck growing antlers. My uncle sent me some landscapes he took out at the farm and some fireworks pictures that were pretty kewl. I went to the electronics store nearby. I found a camera that I will probably buy when I get paid. It makes me mad that I lost my other one but there is no point in crying about it now. I will just have to be more careful with the next one. I am also going to be more careful on the scooter. I actually scared myself last night.

On the way home tonight traffic was blocked off on the main road to my house. There are footbridges periodically over the major roads (and tunnels under them) for pedestrians to get across. There was an old woman on the road under one of them. She must have jumped. The police were there working on her. She was real bloody. It kind of made me sick. I can't handle that type of thing very well. Suicide is a real problem here apparently. Old women and high school students.

I know this hasn't been the cheeriest post and I'm sorry but that is the way it is today. I read before I came over here a post somewhere about the stages of culture shock. I think I am entering the second stage now. I have tried to stay upbeat, and I do love this place and I am having fun, but there are times when I am very frustrated. Little things get to me. I came home tonight and tried to make myself some noodles but I couldn't read the directions and it ended up being too watered down. I still don't have any sheets. I asked if I could buy them and turn in the receipt but that wasn't ok and I feel bad asking Jenny to go to the store with me because she is so busy. I have gone to the store to try to buy things but it is hard to read the labels and I can't even find basic stuff like chicken stock.

Another problem is the limited number of English speakers I have to hang out with. Don't get me wrong, I like them all a lot, but you can't spend all day every day with the same people, especially if one of those people is me. I actually feel sorry for Clayton. He has had to bear the brunt of my neediness. I am trying to give him a break for a while but that means hanging out here by myself or going out and getting in trouble and neither of those things is appealing right now since I am so miserable from this sunburn.

This has turned into quite a rant. It makes me feel better to write about it. I know I will feel better tomorrow.


Anonymous said...

Hang in there babe. Lots of us love you and are wishing you well.